Are you really still making Top Tens?

We only ask because um, we couldn’t help but notice from, like, reading and stuff lately, that folks who are the sorts who write Top Ten lists are still really quite big on Top 10 lists. The fact that we’re rolling over another decade on the odometer of time makes it all the more tempting to write these stupid things, but If we may offer some advice, if you have not yet written a Top 10 list for the end of the year or the decade, keep up the good work. Everyone who’s anyone knows that nowadays, Top Tens are for douches.

We don’t care what Umberto Eco says, he can shut up and you can too. From now on, Top 1 lists are the way to go. By way of explanation, here’s the Top 1 reason why you should confine any Top Whatever list you’re thinking about making to one of one: 1 – Because nobody cares anyway, so stop wasting so much time and space jerking off in public, idiot.

Understand? Good. We’ll start with a few easy ones and add on as the urge strikes. Top 1 lists from readers are encouraged and accepted in the comments section.

Top 1 Live Performance

1. The Mae Shi at the Pawn Shop, away back on January 31. Holy crap, was that something. Anyone who was there’ll read this and totally understand what I’m saying when I say you had to be there.

Top 1 Record that was totally manna from heaven

1. Future of the Left – Travels With Myself and Another

Top 1 Band that I totally want to hear a bona fide full-length album from, soon

1. Sleigh Bells

Top 1 Thing to Think About in your spare moments

1. The miracle of what it takes for you to be able to perceive the combined sensory inputs of any given moment.

Top 1 Anthropomorphization of an act of god

Neko Case – This Tornado Loves You

Top 1 Menudo never sounded so good

We Are WolvesPaloma

Top 1 Dollar Amount of public money that should go towards paying for a new arena for a privately owned hockey team

1. $0

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    • Rich
    • December 17th, 2009

    This is the only blog I ever read. Guess that puts it in the Top 1 list. Congrats!

      • 68comeback
      • December 17th, 2009

      Thank you and congratulations!

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